Most readers now expect to see the next top 10 tips from the guru on all issues, which in a few minutes will turn the idea of life upside down with tips on what to eat and when to go to bed so that life sparkles with all its colors. However, today we will not offer you algorithms on the topic “How to live a life in vain”, we invite you to take part in the discussion on how to force yourself to just take a step to the side and look at yourself from the sidelines: for the past day, for tomorrow's plans.
Let's try.
How to look at your life from the side - the first part of the experiment
The importance of each event in a person’s life is determined by his personal attitude to the situation - this sounds like a banality, but it is not. Let's do a little experiment right at home, alone with ourselves. Take a regular tea mug and a handful of small items such as walnuts. Let it be the most important aspects of your life, but it is aspects, not tasks. For example, one nut may turn out to be “health care,” the other “time spent with children,” the third “creative enjoyment,” etc. Let the cup fill up, because in fact, every nut is the most important thing that we we see for ourselves, but alas, we can’t always realize it.
The second part of the experiment
Doesn't the mug - “our life” seem complete? But look how much space remains between the large nuts. Take as many pine nuts as you can scoop into a handful. Each nut is a task and plans, dreams and goals. There are so many tasks in our life that it makes no sense to list them. This is going to work, making a project, saving up for a vacation ... just pour all the tasks into a mug and make sure that they fit easily between important life aspects. It is more difficult with dreams, because often we confuse what is desired with a simple to-do list for tomorrow. But try it.
Penultimate part of the experiment
Well, is your life a success? Look, it’s almost full. But what about what we do in reality? Where are our social media evenings and hourly phone conversations about anything? Where is watching the series, clicking the remote control on the channels, flipping through a glossy magazine, parties filled with alcohol? Take just such a mug of water and slowly pour it into your life. How? Surprisingly, the fact that we live in reality, wake up every morning and what we strive for in the evening, also fits perfectly between life aspects, plans, dreams and tasks.
Draw conclusions
Why did we all ask you to do this? Just for the last two steps, which will fully convince you that changes in your life are still necessary. We just poured a full cup of water into our lives, and the liquid was successfully distributed between our dreams, goals and priority aspects. Do not be too lazy to refill an empty mug with water to the brim, only this time do not pour it anywhere, and on the contrary, take a few walnuts and try putting them in water.
Happened? Water poured over the edge, and hardly one or two nuts (important life aspects, as we remember) can balance on its surface. And now - unpleasant. Look at both circles that are full, and honestly point out the one that really is your life. And if after that you did not feel unpleasant bitterness in your mouth, then you are a happy person. Or morally dead. One out of two.
Beggar banker
What we described to you in a graphic example of how absolute emptiness filled with everyday vanity gradually becomes the basis of our life, crowding out everything that has at least some real value, is well described in his post by a certain 46-year-old American who is considered successful a citizen of his country.
A prosperous banker with a family, a lot of money and social status, like a blank wall, came across the realization that his option of living his life is only suitable for two lines of a boring obituary at the end of his life. A dreamer in his youth, a talented young man who had read his career as a writer, he suddenly realized that he was impoverished mentally, left without a family, without plans for the future, without understanding why he would wake up in the morning. And he, like a chilling call, like a cry of his sore soul, throws into society, to everyone who accidentally stumbled upon his post in the wilds of the Internet: “People! If you still have life left - live! Create madness, travel, help without looking back to everyone who is possible! Leave a mark, because we are what we leave behind! ”
The pain of memories is dearer to us
You already in the course of our first experiment were able to determine what constitutes the real value of your life, its priorities, its smaller, but such necessary tasks. You freshened up your dreams and you may have already asked the following question: how to live life for good reason? What to spend here this indefinite length of a clean scroll of parchment, which is still clean spread out before us?
You may have noticed that in our life circle there was no place for nostalgia - we did not take even a cedar seed to our share of memories, and here's why. The past is an amazing whirlpool that can take a significant chunk of life online. A person immersed in memories falls out of reality and freezes for a long time in a sleep mode, and positive emotions from the past act no less destructively than negative ones - we at least strive to drive them away, and we leave with joyful nostalgia, losing valuable time.
Do not be proud of the past, if there is nothing to be proud of in the present, do not regret the past, if you did not have what came later belatedly. Each of us has our own deadlines for fulfilling our desires, and trying to extract from the depths of the sunken days the emotional base that formed their basis is no more exciting than opening tea bags in order to sow the tea plantation - it’s pointless and stupid.
What do we live for
Why are we living? In childhood, such an idea does not occur to us, since the answer to this question lies in a person much deeper than an adult bothers to look, and a child, in fact, lives only by the depth of his own perception. Children generally do not have superficial judgment, this diplomacy has come to us over the years. Everything is very clear to them - we live to enjoy every minute, enjoy so much that even 15 minutes for lunch seems like an unfortunate waste of time.
A child of preschool or primary school age can be explained that parents should work, but try on the same situation for themselves - that he will have to sit in a stuffy office or pore in the workshop from 8 a.m. to 6 p.m. for him is unthinkable. He understands that he was born for another - he wants to build beautiful houses, and not to breathe cement dust, to come up with new toys, and not to suffer over drawings to create them. In each profession, he first of all sees its colorful side. Often a day spent with dad at work, when a child sees how his father painfully reaches the deadline for the end of the working day, plunges the little man into shock - how, is this the concept that life was a success?
Destruction of illusions is considered the first step in entering adulthood. “Growing up,” parents will say, not realizing that the basis of the foundation of a correct life position leaves the life of the child — nothing should hamper the enjoyment of life. And the work on which we spend 50% of our lives is even less than anything.
No rules and no tips
The final part of our small conversation should be crowned with some kind of morality, such as that: "Now you know exactly how to live life for good reason." However, returning to the beginning, we repeat - this is not a guide or a set of step-by-step actions. Any guide is the same algorithm suggested by someone with a specific goal, and it is strange to think that the task of some stranger will be the formation of your personal happiness.
Carry out the experiment that we wrote about, then make yourself a cup of coffee or tea and just calmly think, but not about how to live life for good reason - after all, this, in essence, is nothing more than a word. Think about what your most recent look back on the past will be - a look without appreciation and comparison with someone where an unsuccessful deal will flash before your eyes and not pride in a new increase will make you smile.
Just think it over.