Falling in love, the bright start of relationships, the time for courtship - hormones in the body play like that, and the whole world seems kind and joyful. But time passes, and instead of the previous delight, fatigue from relationships appears. The only flaws of the chosen one are striking, and one has to ask not from the heart, but from the mind: "How to understand, do you love your husband?"
What is love?
Many dream of true love, but not everyone can experience this feeling. You need to understand what experienced emotions mean and how to understand whether you love your own husband.
A constant attraction to a person, a great need to see him close by, hear a voice, feel intimacy - all these are signs of falling in love, which can either pass or develop into a stronger and more real feeling.
Sex becomes an expression of physical attraction to a partner, but it must be understood that a strong desire and passion do not yet mean love.
In order not to confuse love with falling in love, you need to remember that falling in love contains a great emotional charge, but love carries peace and sincerity.
Relationship Formation: Stage One
Bright love with strong impulses and emotions gradually begins to subside. The psyche calms down, the hormonal background returns to normal, and then there comes an internal silence, which is often mistaken for the fading of feelings. That's when women ask themselves: “I don’t understand, love or not?”
However, it turns out that there were still no true feelings, and only now relations are starting to build. Indeed, along with falling in love, the illusory look at the soul mate also leaves. Now we begin to see the flaws of others, and the man no longer seems perfect. Many couples cannot cope with this disappointment. They are not ready to accept a real person, they want to see next to only that image that was formed under the influence of first impressions of acquaintance.
Relationship Formation: Stage Two
After the first disappointment comes the acceptance of a partner. The couple learns to live with each other, can discuss any issues, gets rid of closed topics. There is a feeling of very close friendship, and only after that love is formed. There are no longer illusory expectations, but there is a very deep and true contact, free return and understanding of each other.
Not every couple can go through all the stages, and often the relationship ends after passing the love. After all, it can be very difficult to accept a person without illusions, as he really is.
Signs of true love
It is difficult to find the only true answer to the question: “How to understand whether you love your husband?” However, there are signs that speak of strong and sincere feelings :
- Unselfishness. If the relationship is tied only to the benefits received from them, then there is no room for love. Thus, gratitude, respect or affection appears, but true love does not require benefits or material assistance from a partner.
- Attraction. It is not physical desire or desire to satisfy one’s passion. This is a kinship of souls, thanks to which you want to be near your beloved. In it you begin to see the dearest person and feel the need to be near.
- Attitude to disadvantages. A loving person sees other people's flaws, but accepts the imperfection of the partner, not trying to change him.
- Full trust. You can share with your partner the most secret, without fear of misunderstanding or ridicule.
- Lack of doubt. Someone else's opinion or persuasion should not affect your relationship. Disapproving relatives or friends cannot destroy real feelings.
How to make sure a wife loves a husband
To understand your attitude to your husband, you need to understand what you are ready for him. What troubles and misfortunes will you go through together, shoulder to shoulder? The following is a series of questions that need to be answered with a yes or no answer:
- Can you trust this person with your life?
- Let me make important decisions for you?
- In case of his illness, will you be able to give a kidney or part of the liver so that he can live?
- Will you give your life for your beloved?
- Are you ready to be with him if he is in a wheelchair, to look after him and support him in difficult times?
- Are you ready to see this person every day of your life?
- After spending time in separation (for example, a month), will you miss, yearn for your husband and wait for his return?
If you answered all these questions, or most of them, positively, then this is really love, and it is worth considering how to connect your whole life with this person.
Rethinking Relationships
More often than not, a woman asks the question: “How do I understand if I love him?” At a time when the feelings of the partners are dull. A person gets used to what surrounds him, and over time begins to see only shortcomings in his partner. In such a situation, you won’t immediately remember why you really wanted her husband to always love. Doubts in feelings can appear in two cases:
- Selfishness. So, a husband can be a wonderful person and a family man, but only instead of love in his wife’s soul is emptiness. Then it’s worth considering how much effort is put into maintaining the relationship. Indeed, sometimes a woman only expects something from her husband, forgetting that giving attention to a partner is even more pleasant than receiving it.
- Resentment. It happens that the husband accumulates a large number of reasons for apology, and then doubts arise in the feelings experienced. It’s not so easy to love when you are waiting for an apology. In this case, you need to decide for yourself whether the husband deserves your love. And also remember why you loved it from the beginning. If he was able to win your feelings, is his small mistakes and mistakes so important?
How to check if you love husband
These simple steps will help you understand how strong feelings for a partner are:
- Understand emotions. Is the situation really so serious or is it just a short-term moral devastation? Everyone has hard days when it’s so bad that I don’t want to see anyone nearby. And you need to understand the difference between a momentary annoyance at her husband and serious problems in a relationship.
- Decide what love means to you. You may have thought before that it was a strong heartbeat and sweat-wet hands. It happens that, moving to a new stage of relations, people mistakenly consider this a cooling of their former feelings. But for many couples, love is finding peace and tranquility next to a partner.
- Remember why you fell in love with her husband. There were reasons for the marriage, and now you only need to remember the first dates and experienced emotions, conversations and plans for the future. So you can understand what your relationship is lacking now and fix it.
- Imagine that your husband has disappeared from your life. What would she be then? Yes, there were relatives and friends, there was more time for hobbies and friends, but are you ready to live with emptiness where he was always there before?
What a married woman should remember
If a long relationship in marriage began to turn into a routine, then it is worth considering whether it was your fault. A good relationship requires effort on the part of both partners, but it happens that a woman lets the problems arising in a marriage go away, and then asks the question: “How to understand, do you love your husband?”
Listen to your partner . Men and women manifest their emotions in different ways, so the husband may not understand that you expect some action from him. Or he just does not voice his opinion about family problems. You need to pay attention to your partner and talk directly about the relationship, together improving them.
He is not you. So, the husband’s point of view may differ from yours. Try to look at the problem through the eyes of your husband. Perhaps he does not even realize that you are wondering: “How to understand whether you love your husband?” And doubt your own feelings.
Do not live illusions. Each family has its own ideal marriage, so you do not need to look back on friends and adapt to their relationship. Start to appreciate what you two are creating for your future.
Family is the whole world. Forming a family, you and your husband create your own space where you will be safe. Whatever difficulties may fall upon a person, but the mere knowledge that there is a place where they will support him already gives strength. Therefore, it is worth fighting for your family and finding ways to solve the problem without destroying the already created relationship.
It is not always easy to understand whether you really love a person. But if you think that you cannot live without him, if he is more expensive than your own interests, then these are real feelings.