Why don’t I have any friends at all? Many people are tormented by this question. Especially when they are left face to face with some kind of life difficulty. “I don’t even have anyone to share with, not something to help. I’m like one in the whole world, I have no friends.” Loneliness is a terrible punishment, and therefore you need to strive for communication, and the more it is, the happier the person. But how to find friends? The age has passed when you could just go up and say: "Hello, I’m Masha, let's be friends!" We are afraid that they will not understand us correctly, we are ashamed, we have already managed to get disappointed in people more than once. And many generally ceased to believe in the existence of friendship. But it's not right. You can’t close yourself in your “shell”, you don’t need to back off like a cancer. Do not become a lone wolf. Even they, if they could, said that living in a pack is much better! Therefore, forward to new acquaintances and opportunities. And how to make more friends, you will learn from this article.
The first thing you need to do is get rid of pessimistic thoughts: "I have no friends, nobody needs me." Stop. Declare yourself to the world, and let them not think that you are a gray mass, let them hear about you. Try to attend social events. Get used to be in the mass of people. Do you have a hobby or hobby? If not, then you need to come up with. Sign up for fitness, dancing, a needlework club, a swimming pool, any sports activity, a literary club - if only you would like it. There you will meet many new friends. And common interests will help to get closer. After all, the general lesson is a ready-made, inexhaustible topic for a friendly conversation, and there friendship is not far off.
How about charity? Do good deeds. Kindness attracts kindness. Ask for volunteers. There you will surely meet worthy people. Such friends and acquaintances are a real gift from heaven. So you are looking for friends in the right place. Moreover, joint work unites. Exactly what is needed.
If you have difficulty communicating, start dating online. It is much simpler. It is believed that when dealing with a new person it is difficult to look in the eye. The Internet solves this problem. Just do not take virtual communication as an alternative. This is only a stage of communication in order to hone your skills, start acquaintance and continue meeting it in reality.
And now it's worth sorting out the psychological side of the issue. Often the lack of friends is explained precisely by psychological problems, and there are a few tips about this:
- Take goodwill as a rule. It's no secret that people love those who love them. But this alone should not be intrusive. If you immediately pounce on a potential friend, he will run away from you faster than he will understand what kind of person you are. In communication, sincerity is important, many people clearly calculate the falsity. Need a friendly smile, lightness, sincere interest in the interlocutor. Ask what he likes, what hobbies he has in his life, listen more than you say. And in no case do not interrupt the interlocutor, have a conscience, listen to the end, and then speak for yourself.
- In no case should you load a new acquaintance with your problems. Remember, they don’t want sad ones. You can only share your problems with a real, long-standing friend who cares what happens in your life. And with new friends it is better to keep on an optimistic wave, no matter what happens.
- If you were invited to visit, do not think to refuse, it is doubtful in you. But they are useless. If a person is good, you can come to a new company. All the same, you will not guess how the day will turn out. But it’s better to regret what happened than to be tormented by what was not there.
We are spoiled by bad people who offended and humiliated us, were unfriendly. But these are their problems, one should not go in cycles in bad experience. People are different. And so that you no longer get upset and think that “I don’t have friends”, try to get in touch with people, and remember that not all doors are locked. You can definitely find one in which it will be nice to go. Sometimes you will remember the time when you sadly said: "I have no friends." But these will be only memories.