A family is a place where you can return at any time of the day or night, and be sure that they are waiting for you here, they love and understand. It is especially important to have such confidence in children. After all, it is in the family that they acquire the skills and experience necessary for later life. In order for the child to be perfectly socially adapted in the future, mentally and emotionally stable, and also successful, both parents - mom and dad must raise him. Only then will he have the opportunity to observe the correct model of relationships and determine the social roles of men and women in this world.
Unfortunately, single-parent families are increasingly found in Russia and in the world as a whole. A similar trend is steadily gaining momentum and threatens to completely replace the usual way of life, where at least three people — the mother, father and child — are the unit of society.
Psychologists regard raising children in single-parent families as a big problem. Indeed, it is rather difficult for one of the parents to grow a harmoniously developed personality with the right life guidelines. Today, more than ever, there is a need to consider the characteristics of single-parent families and to analyze their main problems.
Let's touch on the terminology
We are so used to talking about the family that we often don’t even think about what this definition means, and what role it plays in the life of every person. In order to correctly understand the term "single-parent family", it is necessary to consider it from the point of view of psychology and sociology.
First of all, when specialists undertake to talk about the family as a whole, they mean by this word a certain group of people, which is a consciously organized cell, held together by common interests, duties and a sense of mutual responsibility. Members of the group lead a common life and consider self-reproduction as the main goal of existence.
As you can see, the classic definition of the familiar word “family” reveals its deep essence and purpose. Any union of a man and a woman should be held together by the birth of children, which means that it is their upbringing that needs to be given greater importance, planning to get married. Based on this, the problems faced by the parent, who is forced to raise a child alone due to various circumstances, become clear.
Referring to the terminology, one can find out that an incomplete family is a group of people who are close by blood and are a parent and a child (several children). Such a model implies that all the basic functions that a mother and father usually carry are taken over by one parent. At the same time, he bears social responsibility for the child, representing his interests as the main guardian - material, psychological, etc.
In the process of upbringing, children do not always receive the necessary degree of socialization, which manifests itself already at school age. If a psychologist and a social educator exist in the educational institution, they will be able to draw the attention of the mother to emerging problems. Otherwise, in adolescence, they can become aggravated and cause a serious personality crisis. I would like to clarify that socialization refers to the perception and assimilation of a combination of behavioral norms, values, knowledge, and the like factors that in the future determine how the individual will interact with society.
Unfortunately, psychologists unanimously argue that individuals who come out of single-parent families usually perceive society a little one-sidedly, and therefore in most cases they encounter a number of problems relating to certain areas of life.
Classification
From the outside it may seem that all single-parent families are identical, but in fact they have a fairly broad classification. The main types of such a cell of society include the following:
- illegitimate;
- Orphaned
- divorced or broken up;
- maternal or paternal.
We will tell you more about each type listed above.
Sources of Single-Parent Families
In modern society, young people are increasingly less likely to tie the knot. Psychologists note a frightening tendency to create late marriages that form when both partners reach a certain level of material wealth. However, at the same time, the percentage of children born out of wedlock is high in society.
This is associated with a change in attitude towards relationships outside of marriage, sexual licentiousness and, at the same time, sexual illiteracy. Against this background, often at a young age, girls become single mothers, whose children will never recognize their fathers. In such families, it is very difficult for a child to obtain information about the social roles of a man and a woman. Therefore, education is often one-sided.
An orphaned family from the point of view of psychology is the most successful, so to speak, among the incomplete. Of course, the death of one of the parents becomes a huge test and grief for the child, which is very difficult to move away from. Psychologically, this blow is experienced by children for more than one year, and many try to cope with it until the creation of their own family. Nevertheless, an orphaned single-parent family is an opportunity to successfully socialize in the future.
Depending on the age at which the child lost his mother or father, he has certain behavioral skills that help him to communicate with the outside world. Even if grief came to the house when the youngest member of the family was completely tiny, a positive image of the deceased parent will always be present in the family. You can contact him in case of gaps in education, which is very important for the formation of a harmonious personality.
Divorced families make up the largest percentage of single-parent families. A feature of this type of family is the guilt, which becomes part of the life of the parent and child remaining in the family. The reasons for divorces are extremely numerous, but most often couples call alcoholism, bad temper, treason, and so on. It is noteworthy that most often a woman filed for divorce. She is the initiator of the breakup of the family. However, in the future it is she who feels abandoned, deceived and unnecessary.
Psychologists say that the main reason for divorces is the psychological immaturity of partners. They misinterpret the concept of “marriage,” which means that they will be faced with deceived expectations with almost 100 percent probability.
Also, often in modern society, a family arises not as a result of the mutual desire of a man and a woman, but as a result of circumstances that compelled it to. This is understood as an unwanted pregnancy, which becomes a kind of foundation for the newly emerged family. Unfortunately, it is rather fragile, and in three to five years, or even earlier, such marriages break up. As a result, the percentage of single-parent families is increasing.
Usually children stay with their mothers. Therefore, as a result, a mother family is formed. She is characterized by hyper-custody, which a woman is trying to compensate for the absence of a man in the house. Such an upbringing leads to the fact that boys become infantile and have difficulty imagining what functions a man should perform in a family, and girls, on the contrary, are overly active and get used, following the example of their mother, to take full responsibility for their loved ones.
Parental single-parent families are a certain rarity, but they are also found in society. Here, too, it is impossible to do without biases in education. Sons in the absence of maternal love grow up cold and cynical, and daughters turn into spoiled and constantly demanding attention of women.
In connection with the foregoing, perhaps the reader will want to ask a question about which single-parent family can be considered harmonious. Unfortunately, one parent cannot compensate for the absence of a second. In the family, the roles of father and mother are not interchangeable, and the contribution of both parents to the education of their offspring is valuable precisely in the aggregate.
Of course, no one will argue that raising a child in an incomplete family is doomed to failure. However, the absence of the second parent will always be felt by the children and will leave a noticeable imprint on their personality.
Briefly about statistics
Statistics of single-parent families today are of interest to many public figures. After all, it is one of the most striking indicators of the state of society. According to the latest data, the number of families where one parent brings up children has grown by 30%. If you translate this number into numbers, you get about six and a half million families. Moreover, the vast majority of them are maternal. More than half of women complain that they receive child support irregularly. And every third mother does not receive material assistance from the father of the child and completely independently contains her child.
Paternal single-parent families in modern Russia account for approximately 0.1 of their total number. This is also quite a lot and indicates that a significant depreciation of the marriage and all that is connected with it has been outlined in society.
Moreover, the percentage of transition of single-parent families to the category of crisis is high. This tendency is associated with a huge number of problems that arise in such cells of society in the vast majority.
It is noteworthy that the number of single-parent large families out of a total of about 10 thousand. In them, one parent brings up from three to five children. This cannot be done without certain subsidies and allowances. Support for the state is very important for single-parent families, and this also applies to ordinary and large social groups.
Single-parent Family Problems: Classification
Any family has a lot of problems, but in situations where children have to be raised alone by their mother or father, they appear brighter and lead to more serious consequences.
All the problems faced by families of the category of interest to us can be summarized in the form of the following list:
- educational;
- medical;
- social;
- economic.
The last two points are often combined into one and considered together. This is due to the fact that economic difficulties lead to social problems, and vice versa.
A few words about the educational process
The upbringing of children from single-parent families proceeds with a number of features and can be considered specific. The main functions of the traditional unit of society are the preservation and transfer of traditions, experience, values ​​and moral standards. All this is possible only within the framework of several generations of blood relatives living on the same territory.
It would be ideal to raise a child together with grandparents, but if this is not possible, then the adult generation should be represented by a married couple. In this case, a group of people goes through several stages of development necessary for the harmonious growth of its younger members.
But in an incomplete family, the older generation is represented only by one person, so she loses a certain balance and harmony. As a result, a scheme is violated in which one part of the group provides material wealth and spiritual needs, while the other receives them in the required quantity. Trying to fully perform all the functions of both parents, the mother or father is experiencing great overload. This cannot but affect the upbringing. Children from single-parent families often say that they would like to see their loved ones more often and complain about a lack of attention.
Unfortunately, the educational process in such cells of society proceeds according to two scenarios. In the first, the mother, namely she most often remains with the child, tries to spend all her energy on work. She seeks to make sure that her child does not need anything. However, for this she has to bear a double load or get a few jobs at the same time.
She can fully cope with her task of earning in the family, but she does not succeed in fully controlling her child. He is left without proper attention and feels abandoned and unnecessary. To get rid of guilt, the mother tries to fully satisfy the material needs of her son or daughter. As a result, children form an incorrect idea of ​​love and care, which in later life will become the only behavior model.
In the second scenario of upbringing, the mother throws all her strength into the development of her child and the supervision of it. The money available in the family is spent on all kinds of circles and sections, where again the mother accompanies the child. In almost all cases, her word is decisive, and interference with a child’s life takes ugly and hypertrophied forms.
As a result of such upbringing, children grow up completely incapable of living separately from their parents, but at the same time, types may arise who seek to leave their home with all their might. In adolescence, this can lead to real rebellion.
Single-parent Family Health
An incomplete family needs state social support very urgently. After all, the problems of such cells of society primarily affect the health of the younger generation. With all the desire to give their child all the best mothers, forced to work hard and hard, can not always notice that the child needs to be taken to a doctor.
Many, left without the help of a second spouse, simply do not have free time and try to treat their children at home. This often leads to the fact that the disease passes into a latent and chronic stage. And in some situations it progresses altogether. Thus, children in single-parent families are more prone to relapses of colds and viral diseases, which occur with multiple complications.
There are also categories of families that deliberately avoid going to the doctor. They simply do not have the necessary funds to purchase medicines or pay for the examination. Despite the fact that medicine in our country is free, doctors often refer the child to paid procedures. Naturally, families where income is made up solely of the earnings of one adult cannot afford it. As a result, until the situation gets out of control and becomes critical, children do not fall into a medical institution. Naturally, this does not contribute to improving the health of the child.
Socio-economic problems: poverty
A family where both parents bring up the baby usually has a higher income, since it consists of the earnings of the father and mother. In the event of a divorce or other reason leading to the collapse of the marriage, material liability falls on the shoulders of one family member. And, unfortunately, often it becomes a woman. Even with a huge desire to earn money, she is not able to fully compensate for the financial gap in the budget. This is due to many reasons.
The main reason can be attributed to lower earnings of women compared with men. Despite the fact that in our country, many ladies successfully work in typically male positions, it is extremely difficult for the majority to provide for the everyday needs of children.
It is also worth considering that child support received from the father of the children cannot cover half the cost of the child. At the same time, the percentage of deviators who for several years absolutely do not help their former wives materially raise children is high.
Many mothers were faced with the problem of employment. Having a child in her arms and in the absence of support from the second parent, the woman is forced to be very selective about her position. She has to abandon the shift schedule, options with possible business trips and work with irregular days.
Employers also do not seek to take single mothers into the company. After all, they need a full social package, which they plan to actively use. This is not suitable for everyone. Therefore, in an incomplete family, adults regularly face material difficulties.
We characterize families in terms of security
We have already talked about poverty, and it is worthwhile to understand that all single-parent families face it in one way or another. But sometimes they even have to live for some period of time without income for irresistible reasons. In this case, the state can provide assistance to single-parent families. , . , , .
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Social problems
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Social problems include the relationship between mother and child. Unfortunately, in single-parent families, they are often far from ideal. Children have a tendency to shift the blame for the separation of their parents and under this load begin to behave in ways that are unusual for them. And mothers, tired of problems and worries, often frustrate their child with anger, which clearly does not help to establish contact. Thus, people live on the same territory who cease to understand each other and lose the concept of proximity.
Conclusion
Listing all the problems of single-parent families is not easy. After all, each situation is still individual, and it must be considered taking into account the mass of additional factors. Psychologists advise the parent left with the child not to try to overcome all the hardships alone. Be active and involve relatives, psychologists, various charitable organizations in your life and communicate with families in such a situation. This will give you strength and help partially solve financial difficulties.