When something bad happens in life, a person closes in himself. Depression, which is the eternal companion of serious problems, is not long in coming. How to stop living in the past and return to the present? Below are the tips, following which you can look at this world more optimistically.
Why don't you want to let go of the past?
Have you decided that it's time to help yourself and finally get out of depression? How to stop living in the past? The desire to start a new life is already the first step towards achieving the goal. If you have thoughts that you need to get out of the difficult situation you are in, it means that you have the strength to realize your goal. The first thing you must do is honestly answer the question of why you do not want to let go of the past. The answers can be very different. Someone has lost a loved one and does not believe that he can find a replacement for him. Someone has lost his job and now does not know what to do. And someone could lose the meaning of life in one day. In any case, the past keeps one who has suffered some kind of hardship and now does not believe in a bright future. Find a reason that keeps you from moving on. When you understand exactly what happened and what you are afraid not to find, you can move on.
Accept everything that happened in your life
A person can survive everything that is destined for him. Unauthorized people leave only very weak people. Do not become one of them. Believe me, if a lot of trials have fallen on your lot, it means that for some reason you needed them. Difficulties temper character, deprivation makes the will stronger. How to stop living in the past? A man must accept everything that happened to him. Forgive the people who offended you, accept all the circumstances and no longer get angry at fate. The past cannot be returned or corrected. You can correct your mistakes in the present, but, alas, not all. Go back a few years ago and replay your actions will not work. Therefore, accept everything that happened to you. Do not blame anyone and do not complain about anything. When you can internally relive and accept the past, you will be freed from the burden that has been putting strong pressure on your shoulders for many years.
Learn to enjoy every day
How to stop living in the past? One must begin to see the present. This wonderful gift is not shared by everyone. Accustom yourself to the present gradually. Find something good in every day. Waking up in the morning, look out the window. Seeing a beautiful sunrise, rejoice that fate has given you the opportunity to admire this beauty. Did your favorite person make coffee or did your child make breakfast? Do not take it for granted. Say thank you to your loved one and enjoy the cooked food. Joyful moments can also be found on the way to work. For example, it will be nice to see a bright, well-dressed lady in the gray crowd. Perhaps you can take note of some element of a woman’s clothes so that tomorrow you can dress in the same way. Or maybe you will find the first snowdrop on the street amid the snow. Learn to see the beauty of this world. First, find at least something good, and then get used to think positively and see joys not only in every day, but in every moment of life.
Learn to understand yourself.
People live in an eternal race for some kind of fictional prize. Do not try to overtake or overtake someone. You have your own destiny. Do not be aligned with your surroundings. You should live in harmony with yourself, and not try to prove something to someone. How to stop living in the past? Psychologists say that every person should understand himself. Think about what you want and where you are aiming. Remember what brought you joy before and what you had to give up because of the circumstances. Think about what you eat and whether you like what you eat. Many people live on the machine, not thinking about their routine. The habits that a person has started make him lead a boring life. Try to understand what you like and what you want. Diversify your life. To understand what you really want, you need to think more. Someone may say that he does not have time. Each person can find half an hour to return home not by public transport, but on foot. If you travel far, get a few stops earlier. Make a habit after work to take stock of the day and plan the evening. Thinking like this will make your life more conscious.
Do a house cleaning
How to stop living in a past relationship? It is necessary to throw out everything superfluous from the house and from the head. Start putting things in order around you. The order in the apartment is an indicator of the order in the head. Start throwing away extra stuff. Everything that reminds you of an unsuccessful romance should be taken to the trash. At the same time, you can throw out all the cracked and ugly things. Surround yourself with those objects that you want to touch and which will be pleasantly admired. Someone may say that you cannot run away from yourself. And indeed it is. But getting rid of trash, a person is morally freed. When a person enters a bright and comfortable house, it becomes easier for her to realize how cozy she arranged her home. And when a person comes to a cluttered apartment, he begins to be haunted by depressing thoughts that everything is collapsing in life, and the eternal mess does not allow to live normally.
Say goodbye to the people who pull you down
How often have you heard the phrase "do not live in the past - live in the present"? Easy to say, but hard to do. How can one bring a bright future closer to oneself? Review your social circle. Leave in it only those people with whom you are really interested. Often among friends there are individuals with whom you communicate for the sake of decency. And these people only do that they poison your life, spread rumors and spoil your mood. You need to part with energy vampires. Interrupt all communication with them. Maybe it will be embarrassing for you to tell your childhood friend that your paths should diverge, but it’s better to do it, and not endure the annoying person nearby. Be tougher. Then unworthy persons will stop pestering you. After “cleaning” your friends, it will be easier for you to let new people into your social circle.
Describe your dreams
Many people have a poor idea of what they want. It seems to them that they know their dreams, but when you ask them about it, in fact it turns out that their dreams are an idea of happiness imposed by advertising. Do you want to forget the past and live in the present? Then you need to decide what you want. Take a piece of paper and write on it the perfect day of your ideal life. Then you need to look through the record and understand whether it is sincere dreams or imposed by someone. If your imaginary life looks like this: I drive up to a skyscraper on my snow-white Mercedes, go up to the 100th floor in my snow-white office, where I am the director, etc., then your idea of happiness is insincere. Always specify what exactly you want to do, what to do and why this particular brand of machine is vital for you.
Set goals
When dreams are formed, they need to be turned into goals. How to let go of the past and start living? You should make a life plan. Each person will look different. Someone will have family priority, while someone else will have a career. It's quite normal. But prescribing your basic life goals, do not be lazy and draw a life circle. Designate each of its sectors with those areas of life that you consider important. It can be: family, work, health, friends, hobbies, etc. After that write the goals. See that your life is not one-sided. You should not concentrate on only one area. Try to work through everything at the same time. Then harmony will be restored in your life, and you will not get hung up on the past.
Where to find motivation?
You don’t know how to let go of the past and start living in the present? Try to motivate yourself. How can this be done? Think about why you were born? To leave a mark on this world. In what area of life do you have a chance to realize your talents? If this is a hobby, then you need to concentrate on it. If you like your job, then try to climb the career ladder. Perhaps you have wonderful kids growing up? Then try to get out of depression for their sake. There will always be people around you who want you to feel better. Just look more closely, and at the initial stage they can become an incentive for you to get out of the impasse. Subsequently, you should find motivation within yourself. You must be motivated by the business you are doing. Work will help you succeed and give vent to your abilities.
Get a diary
In order to keep pace and track your success everywhere, you should start a diary. It will help to forget the past and start living anew. How to achieve success in a new life? You should carefully and painstakingly plan your day, week, month and year. It is advisable to have a plan for the next five years. Then you will be able to work productively, not only for a short period, but also find the strength for continuous work. In order not to be upset every day about the fact that we managed less than planned, do not plan for the day more than two major tasks and three small tasks. Then you will enjoy living productively and meaningfully.