Girls dream of a happy and romantic relationship. But, as it so happened in the public mind, taking decisive steps is a men's prerogative. Representatives of the stronger sex, as luck would have it, are in no hurry to take those very steps, because they are afraid of the restrictions and responsibilities that accompany the relationship. How to push a man to develop a relationship if you are tired of being in limbo?
Why is a man lingering
To figure out how to push a man to develop a relationship, you need to try to figure out why you are marking time. Male "sluggishness" in a relationship may have several explanations:
- He is eyeing you. Men, like women, dream of a faithful companion for life. Perhaps he wants to get to know you better in order to understand how you fit his ideal.
- He is not self-confident. Perhaps the slowness of the gentleman is due to the fact that he is panicky afraid of failure. If you are used to playing the role of the Snow Queen, do not be surprised at the current situation.
- He does not see you as a life partner. It is possible that a man does not have serious intentions regarding you at all. He simply does not want to while away alone time before meeting the woman of his dreams.
- He’s so comfortable. A beautiful woman, a regular intimate life, delicious food and no obligations - this is a comfort zone for most men, an ideal development.
Be self-sufficient
Being independent and self-sufficient is a sure way to push a man to develop relations. The fact is that many women make a tactical mistake, demonstrating their attachment to a man and his dependence on him. In this case, the cavalier can draw two conclusions for himself:
- Why take the initiative if it is still not going anywhere from me?
- It pursues selfish goals, so I will not translate the relationship into a more serious direction.
Your task is to demonstrate to the man that you are feeling quite well both with him and without him. And show him that you are an independent person who copes well without male help and support. This will make the gentleman think that he can lose you at any time if he does not take a decisive step.
Take care of yourself
No matter how much they talk about the beauty of the soul and the importance of the inner world, every man wants to see a beautiful, elegant girl next to him, who is nice to look at, who is not ashamed to go out with. Therefore, your main task is to carefully monitor your appearance.
But in pursuit of attractiveness, the main thing is not to overdo it. According to statistics, most men prefer to see simple cute girls next to them, rather than a vamp or a sex bomb. These and similar images, of course, attract representatives of the stronger sex, but do not at all have a serious relationship.
Do not limit your freedom
A fairly effective option, how to push a man into a relationship, is to be free. If there is nothing serious between you, then with what joy should you limit yourself in actions? It turns out that you can do what you want, when you want and with whom you want. And they are not at all obliged to report to their gentleman (and even more so to take permission from him).
Moreover, if a man does not seek to transfer your relationship to a higher level, you are not required to see him whenever he wants to. Pretend that you have more important plans (or maybe they really are). This will make the man think about whether he is behaving correctly with you.
Be a riddle
Many women at the very beginning of a relationship make a tactical mistake, revealing themselves to a man. At the first date, some ladies, as in an interview, spread all the information about themselves. Thus, they discourage the man from all interest in further "research". Unlike women who look at relationships from a romantic and practical point of view, for the stronger sex it is a kind of game or quest in which they must obtain information.
How to push a man to a serious relationship? Submit information about yourself dosed. So that each time he has even more intriguing questions. Present it as a kind of reward for some actions of a man (date, gift, and so on). Even if you are not the most interesting person in terms of biography and inner world, do not show it. Maintain the areola of mystery until the gentleman head over heels in love with you.
Do not take on unnecessary obligations
It would seem that you are doing everything to ensure that your gentleman feels cozy and comfortable next to you, but there are no advancements. How to motivate a man to a relationship in this case? This is the mistake. You are doing what the life partner should do, although in fact it is not.
Do not indulge a man with delicious food, iron his shirts, clean his house, if you do not yet see the prerequisites for becoming his wife. Do it occasionally, according to your mood. So that the man understands how it can be good and comfortable with you, but he does not get used to it and does not take it for granted.
Take your time with intimacy
What can push a man to action in a relationship? Oddly enough, the lack of intimacy. The point is not to use sex as an instrument of blackmail. The point is to give both yourself and him the opportunity to understand the true intentions and motives of the relationship.
The fact is that the male attitude to intimacy is fundamentally different from the female. If for a woman this is a manifestation of love, for a man it is simply a physiological need. Thus, if a man is still with you and takes some steps with a long absence of sex, then you really are not indifferent to him. Otherwise, he quickly retreats and sets off in search of a more accommodating lady.
Make him jealous
Any woman will be worried if she notices a lack of progress in the relationship. How to push a guy to decisive action? The surest way is to make him jealous. After all, men are hunters by nature. They like to conquer (including women).
It's not at all about stooping to cheating and flirting with other guys. Just more often be in the company of representatives of the opposite sex (at work or in a circle of friends). If your gentleman notices that other men are genuinely interested in you, he will surely be worried. After all, the opponent may be more proactive. This will make him reconsider his attitude towards you.
Share his hobbies
For some reason, modern men find it difficult to decide on a serious relationship. How to push a guy to a crucial step? Become a good friend to him who understands him and shares his hobbies. Moreover, this must be done sincerely and without pretense.
In fact, there’s nothing supernatural about rooting for his favorite sports team, starting to watch his favorite series, add his favorite tracks to the playlist, read his favorite book, and then discuss it. Believe me, no one wants to let go of such a soul mate.
Surprise effect
Sometimes, in order to make an important decision, a person needs shock therapy. If your man shows passivity in a relationship, surprise him. But not a romantic surprise, but an unexpected "cooling" in your relationship. If you are really dear to the gentleman, this situation will surely alarm him. When he tries to understand the reason for your unexpected suspension, you will have a great opportunity to subtly and accurately hint about what you do not like about the relationship.
Talk frankly
If the hints and tricks do not work (or give the wrong effect that you expected), it may be time to talk openly. Yes, men do not like such talk about relationships. And women do not like uncertainty, and this also needs to be treated with understanding and respect.
A frank conversation will help you put all the points over i. Even if it results in parting, take it positively. Of course, it hurts and is sad. But on the other hand, you will no longer spend time and energy on a futile relationship.
Some more useful tips
How to push a man to develop a relationship? You need to convince him that you are the only one with whom he wants to go through life. Here are some guidelines to help you with this:
- Do not take away his personal space. Do not try to dig into the phone, do not ask for passwords from social networks, do not require a meeting report. Well, of course, do not try to spend all your free time with him. Thus, the man will lose his fear of losing freedom in alliance with you.
- Give compliments. It turns out that men also love this. With you, the gentleman will feel like a real hero, will not want to lose this feeling. But do not flatter, but praise the man in the case.
- Learn to listen. Not only women love to chat. Sometimes the stronger sex also wants to speak out and share. You must not only listen, but also remember what the gentleman tells you.
- Make pleasant surprises. But not often, otherwise it can be taken as an obsession.
- Argue less. Men sometimes need to concede so that they can feel like knights. Give him the opportunity to take the initiative and implement it.
Conclusion
If for a long time you have been unable to push a guy to decisive action, think about whether there is any sense in such a relationship? You need to be able to accept defeats and let go of those who are not interested in you (or rather, to get rid of them yourself). In addition, in a society of a non-initiative gentleman, you simply spend precious time, although you could have been happy with someone more serious and responsible for a long time. Get rid of this burden and open up new promising acquaintances.