Mikhail Efimovich Litvak, a candidate of medical sciences and a well-known psychotherapist, conducted research in targeted modeling of emotions, intellectual nirvana, oratory to develop techniques for overcoming controversial and conflict situations in the family and at work. "Psychological Aikido" is also one of the methods developed by him, successfully implemented in the practice of advising families, administrators, businessmen and leaders.
Psychological Aikido Method
In controversial situations, when it is necessary to show common sense and peace of mind, when it is necessary to convince the "opponent" and make sure that he does not feel offended, but voluntarily follows your position, the "psychological aikido" tactic works especially effectively.
Aikido fighter falls in the direction in which the opponent pushes him. At the same time, he carries away an opponent, a little energy - and he is already upstairs, using the strength of his opponent. The principle of psychological aikido is based on the same thing - on depreciation, but only in communication. If you were pushed from a height, that is, a fall was imposed, then initially you amortize, trying to repay the consequences of the push, and only then get on your feet.
The Basics of Psychological Aikido
Psychological Aikido is the most flexible and effective tactic for resolving disputed and conflict situations. Especially if the opponent is actively resisting. Before attacking the enemy, it is necessary to extinguish his resistance, that is, to remove his desire to object and prove. It is necessary to arrange it for yourself, to make it accepting and understanding, and only then you can begin to persuade. So the psychotherapist Litvak considers. “Psychological Aikido” is based on a clear and quick conviction with reliable arguments. It’s great if you use metaphors and truisms in your objections. Your speech should be beautiful and long. Various deceptive moves and tricks should be cleverly conspiratorial. The opponent’s position must be destroyed flexibly and technically, smoothly moving to his proposal.
That is, psychological aikido does not imply a complete denial of the opponent’s position, initially you support it and only then move on to your strong arguments. As a result, you not only gain up over the enemy, but also strengthen your relationship with him. This is another conclusion that the psychotherapist Litvak M.E. "Psychological Aikido" eliminates the occurrence of conflicts, tension and irritation in communication.
At work and at home, situations often arise when conflicts develop according to one scenario, and you can predict in advance how a partner will behave in a particular case. This knowledge can also be used in the methodology of “psychological aikido” for preventive depreciation. Carnegie said this trick: “Tell about yourself what your prosecutor was going to say, and you will deprive him of the sail of the wind!” Carry out preventive depreciation at work. To do this, it is enough to come to the boss and inform him of your mistakes, without waiting for his criticism.