Divorce proceedings - the procedure itself is unpleasant. It entails both financial losses and nervous upheavals. As for the first nuance, then the waste falls on the shoulders of both spouses, especially if they have common minor children. And in the second aspect, for some reason, they always support the girl. It is generally accepted that in a divorce, the injured party is always a woman. And it doesnโt matter if the spouses disagree on her initiative or on his own. After all, often the way men experience divorce is seen only by their close circle.
Also often the strong half keeps everything in themselves, which subsequently negatively affects their health. So itโs not clear who is even easier to survive the divorce: a woman who immediately splashes out all negative emotions and goes through the stages of denial, rejection, acceptance and reassurance in the coming months after a divorce, or a man who wears everything in himself, trying to appear calm and strong.
Alternative to divorce
How do men survive a divorce? First, let's try to dispel myths on this issue.
One of the common ones is that a man gets divorced in order to receive the long-awaited freedom. Yes, many representatives of the stronger sex do not withstand the pressure of wives who constantly saw them about friends or work. But in order to get rid of this, it is not necessary to divorce. A man can just leave for a while and be alone. But then he will still return to his beloved, all-forbidden wife.
Indeed, after a divorce, the former spouse, although she feels freedom, but she quickly gets bored. Then he again wants to be with his loving woman. Therefore, in such cases, when he leaves you, most likely someone has appeared at the husband, and choosing between you and his mistress, he made a choice not in your favor. And as practice shows, such decisions often end in nothing. Either the woman to whom he leaves is not ready for such a sacrifice, or the relationship is already uninteresting to both. Such an alliance quickly ends.
An enviable groom. Is that how a man becomes?
The second myth is that the former spouse becomes an enviable groom. Partly it is, but not right away. How do men survive a divorce? At first, the representative of the stronger sex becomes very vulnerable. Therefore, he needs a woman rather as a vest, in which you can cry. And here not many can agree to such an unenviable role, since they themselves all understand and do not want to be as an escort for a couple of meetings.
And the man, in turn, is not ready for a serious relationship. Already after some time, when the storms of emotions subside and freedom begins to bring pleasure, he is ready to meet with the girls. But the minus is that he is ready to communicate with more than one woman. And not everyone will agree to such a role.
Well, when the first stages are completed, then the man is ready again for a serious relationship. But near him may not be the only one with whom he is ready to once again plunge into family relationships. Either the women did not wait for him, or the ladies nearby were not the same. After all, a man will now look more carefully at his chosen one, so as not to step on the previous rake.
Defensive reaction
Well, the third myth, which today's article is devoted to, is that men are more likely to experience divorce. A decent father of the family begins to lead a loose lifestyle. But this is more likely his defensive reaction, since he does not quite understand how he should behave. And especially if the divorce was on his initiative, and everyone around him begins to look at him with condemnation, supporting his ex-wife. Another not very pleasant aspect is housekeeping. He, perhaps, not once imagined how everything will happen, but in reality it turns out not as he wanted.
The dishes, it turns out, do not wash themselves, the food does not cook, and the products in the refrigerator do not appear on their own. And here it is worth noting that women are much easier. They are already accustomed to doing household chores, and they even become somewhat relieved. No need to clean socks, wash dishes, cook, etc.
An important role is also in how each person experiences a divorce, the opinion of others plays. They can support or condemn. It is also much easier for a single man to adapt to society than a woman.
So how do men survive a divorce? For the stronger sex, this is a slightly more global problem than for women, since it is limited in communicating with children. He no longer has the power to influence their upbringing as before. The man again has to learn to live in other conditions, unusual for him.
Child and divorce
And how to survive a divorce for a man whose child is left with his mother? Now let's figure it out. As already noted, the most difficult thing for a man, especially if he was a loving father, is separation from the children. Many women generally begin to manipulate the meetings of the father with the child. This inflicts the most severe trauma on the male psyche. And here he is alone with this problem, especially if the spouse became the initiator of the divorce. He has no supporters. After all, everyone believes that he deserved it and let him suffer now, since he himself is to blame for everything.
Are men experiencing a divorce? Yes. As mentioned above, the first problems also arise with housekeeping. A man has to take care of himself, but he does not know how to do it, because before his wife was engaged in everything. In addition, he is left alone with his problems.
And soon the bachelor life begins to become boring and becomes completely unnecessary to the man who dreamed about her. He begins to experience the stage of self-destruction. Drinks alcohol, erratic relationships and many other bad habits. That is, he tries to get enough at once with everything that he lacked in marriage. And he does not realize that he is more and more drawn into the routine of obscurantism.
Male initiator
How does a man experience a divorce on his own initiative? The first thing a former spouse begins to do after leaving his wife is to collect messy relationships. Even if he left her for his mistress, the man quickly realizes that he is not ready for a new serious relationship. Now he wants to try a lot more sexually than another companion can give him. He begins to think that somewhere there sultry beauties are waiting for him, which will provide him with a gamut of unforgettable and colorful relationships.
But in reality, his dreams do not come true. Every new woman needs to be looked after. Messy connections can lead to a number of diseases. And as it turns out, none of the temporary lovers are ready to adapt to him and treat him with understanding.
Advice
How to help a man survive a divorce? It is very important that in such a difficult period for him there were friends nearby who could support him. You should not rush to extremes, but itโs better to stay home again and spend time reading a book or other favorite pastime. You should not take revenge on your ex-wife if she was the initiator of the divorce. Try to be calm and balanced. Better direct all your energy into a job or hobby.
Remember that when you are undergoing a divorce and blame it on everyone but yourself, your ex-second half also suffers. Better try to study your mistakes so that you donโt repeat them again.
Recommendations for ex-spouses
How do men and women survive divorce? Both spouses are experiencing a difficult separation, especially after long years of life. But each of them does it his own way. Women in such situations are the most collected. Since they now need to answer not only for themselves, but the burden of responsibility on their shoulders also lies with children who will now grow up without a father. Whatever the reason for the divorce, remember that you always have to stay people. Therefore, you should try to maintain friendly and respectful relations.
Conclusion
Now itโs clear how a man can survive a divorce from his wife. In any case, each partner needs support. Therefore, friends and relatives should help former spouses.