Friendly communication plays a huge role in human social life. Friends are like-minded people whom we trust and turn to for advice and support in difficult times in life. Over the years, they rejoice at all our victories and are sad with us during a period of failure.
With age, a person changes and develops, and his friendships change. Unfortunately, not always for the better. Sometimes a friend no longer gives that positive, as before, and sometimes causes only negative emotions.
And you understand that your paths have diverged, and you want to stop communicating. But how to get rid of a friend tactfully, without tantrums and scandals? In this article you can read about when you need to part with a person. And what to do to make the process painless for all parties.
Toxic friendship
All girls who are thinking about how to get rid of a girlfriend should get acquainted with the term âtoxic friendshipâ. By this phrase it is customary to understand a format of relations in which you maintain a friendly relationship with a person, but at the same time something in communication does not suit you. The first sign of âtoxic friendshipâ is the lack of pleasure from spending time together.
The whole tragedy of such "poisonous" ties is that they are not easy to break. If a friend betrayed, deceived or uttered nasty things, then breaking up with her is easy. But what if there was nothing like this, but after each meeting you have a breakdown and self-esteem? That is, the realization that there are negative aspects in your relationship is there, but what to do with it is not known.
When is the time to leave?
Psychologists recommend honestly answering several questions:
- Do these relationships change me for the worse?
- Is this a temporary stage of the relationship or the like has always happened, but each time I closed my eyes?
- Is there a feeling that my friend is enjoying my failures and problems?
- Are they using me?
- There is a feeling that I constantly solve other people's problems?
- Have I lost friends because of this person?
If the answer is yes to all questions, then you should think about how to get rid of a bad girlfriend. There are several good ways to do this.
Phased decrease in communication
How to get rid of a friend tactfully and without scandal? One of the best methods is to gradually reduce communication. The process is long, but the least painful. And you should not confuse him with the complete disregard for his girlfriend - this will cause a violent reaction on her part.
With a gradual decrease, you spend less time together: if earlier the meetings were daily, reduce their number to 1-2 times a week, then to a couple of times a month, and then completely disappear from her life. To avoid resentment, refer to the strongest employment and do not forget to come up with a believable legend. But itâs best to really engage in work, a new hobby or play sports. In general, "I'm sorry dear, but there is no time for you!"
This technique is good in that with a decrease in the number of meetings, anger and irritation often disappear, and you understand that there were a lot of this person in your life. But when the meetings became more rare, you again got in touch. Here's how to get rid of your annoying girlfriend and not lose a person forever!
Straight Talk
Are you too much personal? Have you been friends for many years? You canât imagine yourself without this person, but you donât want to continue the âtoxicâ relationship?
If we talk about how to get rid of my best friend, then the best way out is a frank conversation. Think it over in advance. Sketch on paper everything that does not suit you. And express everything directly in the face - calmly, without insults and negative emotions.
If a friend begins to make excuses, she is worth listening to. This is a good chance to start a constructive dialogue and understand what to do next. As a result of the conversation, you will have to listen to a lot of unpleasant things about yourself - after all, your best friend has probably accumulated her grievances, since no one is perfect.
After such a conversation, a new round of friendship is possible - updated, without old insults. Or the final break.
It is important here not to fall into the trap: in one form of âtoxicâ friendship, such conversations are conducted regularly, emotionally, and to the point of complete exhaustion of forces. If you have repeatedly sorted out relationships with your best friend, then itâs better to find another way to make a break.
Provocation
How to get rid of a friend so that she was the initiator of the break? In fact, this is a rather dangerous, albeit effective, method. It is important here not to go too far and not to put pressure on a too sore spot, so as not to be a scumbag in the eyes of not only the ex-girlfriend, but also the immediate environment.
What are we doing? We actively criticize our girlfriend, but gently: we note an unsuccessful hairstyle, make-up, choice of clothes, etc. Do not forget to say that she is wrong - always and everywhere. We blur out an âawkwardlyâ embarrassing secret - a small skeleton from the closet, and something small, but shameful. Then we apologize!
In general, we behave like a real "toxic" girlfriend, and very soon they will want to get rid of you themselves.
Completely stop communication
Most often, girls are concerned about the question of how to get rid of an annoying girlfriend. Really annoying, which does not recognize your right to spend your personal time on other people too. Her distinguishing features are the excess of free time and the lack of personal life, which she compensates by listening to stories about your love relationship. She is often chatty and has no other friends to fulfill her need for communication. So you take the whole blow.
In fact, such people are often unhappy. And some only out of pity continue communication, in fact, resigned to the constant presence in the life of an outsider. But not everyone is ready for such a sacrifice.
Sometimes a method of phasing out communication works with annoying friends - to an acceptable level, after which they become quite pleasant and welcome guests in your home.
But sometimes such people are not able to behave tactfully: they rush into you, regardless of whether you are busy or not, do not listen to your words that you do not have time, and literally haunt you everywhere. They put pressure on pity, while being offended by ignored calls and messages. Such people lack the concept of personal boundaries. These are real energy vampires.
How to get rid of this obsessive girlfriend of this type? Here you have to apply the tactics of complete ignore and disguise. You are now not at home, you canât answer calls, now itâs strictly forbidden to call you, and at home your new boyfriend and beloved hamsters interfere with communication. In casual meetings in person, refer to employment, a despot husband, children taking all their strength, and exhausting work.
Over time, this person will find another donor victim, and already she will have to listen to everything that excites this person in every second of time.
Communication after breaking up
How to get rid of a girlfriend, all approximately represent. But not every person realizes that this is only the first stage of competent separation. The second is communication after the break and the reaction to questions from the immediate environment.
Your ex-girlfriend may have one circle of communication with you, or you are colleagues, or studied together, so you will have to meet. You can even accidentally collide on the street. Therefore, we learn to respond to such meetings correctly: you should smile, say hello, throw a couple of banal phrases and disperse. No deep personal conversations and long conversations!
You donât need to delete your ex-girlfriend from social networks - it will look childish. You have 500 contacts in your friends, and among them are people you donât even remember. So let her ex-girlfriend calmly be on the list of friends.
When asking about the reason for the break, you should be considerate and not throw mud on your ex-girlfriend, even if she does it against you. You are a rock, flint, finally, just a good person and above all these showdowns!