How to learn to control your emotions, if they sometimes overwhelm you so that under their influence you break down on your loved ones, commit rash acts, which you later repent of, bite your elbows, but nothing can be changed?
Stenic emotions and asthenic
Emotions are divided into stenic and asthenic. The former accelerate vital activity: small blood vessels expand, which means that the work of all organs, especially the brain, becomes more active, and you feel a surge of strength. All this happens, for example, under the influence of a sense of joy.
Sadness and others negative emotions, on the contrary, inhibit all processes in the body, reduce brain and motor activity, make a person feel tired and exhausted.
But any emotions are an integral part of the human psyche. Therefore, it’s impossible not to test them at all, but to suppress and ignore them is harmful. But managing them is a difficult task, but quite feasible. How to learn to control your emotions? There are several steps to take.
Causes of emotions
Most likely, you can’t always tell exactly why you were “out of sorts” during the day and finally fell into a conversation with one of the household members. The fact is that the cause of a bad mood is often a trifle that instantly causes irritation. For example, you didn’t like the loud music on the bus that you were driving to work. Surely you will soon forget about this in the cycle of affairs, but the irritation will remain. And it will seem to you that your colleagues or homeworkers are behaving inappropriately.
Another unnoticed reason may be some kind of anxious or sad thought that flashed through your head. For example, the boss did not greet you - and it seemed to you that he wants to fire you. Having tracked such anxiety, you can think: does it have any serious grounds under it?
Statement and understanding
How to learn to control your emotions? The first step is to grasp the moment when they arose and understand what really caused them. Observe yourself for a while, and you will begin to be more conscious about your feelings.
Separation from emotion
The second step to gaining control is to distance oneself from one’s negative feelings. When you learn to notice them and understand their reasons, you will no longer pay attention to the stimulus, but to the emotion itself. Watch her as if she is not part of you, but some separate being. Your emotions are, of course, part of you, but not all of your consciousness. When you separate the emotion from yourself, it will no longer be able to completely capture you, take control of you, as before, and will quickly disappear.
Gaining control
How to learn to control your emotions and how long will it take? Control can not be obtained immediately and not completely: like any other skill, it comes gradually, is achieved in small steps. It is hardly possible to immediately change one’s attitude to the world, to events and people.