It is ironic, but unrequited love is a rather painful feeling if it remains unrequited, and the object of your passion sees you as only a good friend. We can say that since the good old days of Shakespeare nothing has changed, love has remained for some the most beautiful fairy tale, and for others - the worst of nightmares. At different times in our lives, each of us experienced the torment of unrequited love. For some, this period ends and they move on, but some cannot get rid of the overwhelming feeling and begin to feel their inferiority, thinking that they will find it only when reciprocity is reached, otherwise life will lose its meaning. And without the meaning of life, a person becomes depressed, lethargic and uninitiated.
Unrequited love seriously distracts from life!
A woman may find herself in an even more difficult situation if the one she is in love with is married. The state of unrequited love becomes an obsession. Thoughts are constantly directed to the object of love, all the little things, songs, an unexpectedly spoken word reminds you that your feelings are unrequited. All dreams are aimed only at presenting oneself in a life together with a loved one. This is pain, a constant pain that burns the chest and does not release for a minute.
A condition when you are haunted by depressing thoughts can lead to lethargy, anxiety, work remains in the background, sleep goes away, depression comes. Nothing makes food more tasteless than unrequited love. All the pleasures of life lose their meaning. What can be done about this? Emotional feelings need to be adjusted to reduce or even stop the pain. Try to find some tips on how to get rid of unrequited love, if only to live and move on.
Tip one: admit that enough to dream, it's time to understand that there are no prospects in a relationship
There are many tips about steadfastness and determination to break a hopeless relationship, but more than ever, in this case, these qualities take on the meaning of vital. You need to learn how to be flexible and look for ways to reduce your losses from unrequited feelings.
It is necessary to change the direction of thoughts and understand that the opinion that it is worth trying a little and the girl (or guy) in our hands is mistaken and exists only in the imagination. Do not give in to your thoughts, remember how much time you have already spent on your unrequited love. Stop dreaming! Perhaps this is cruel, but look into the eyes of reality, take the first step towards real life, discarding futile dreams and baseless hopes.
Tip two: recognize that love lives in the imagination
What do you know about love in prison? The attractiveness of an unattainable object is most clearly manifested there. It is unlikely that you have met the idea of unattainability, embodied in life. Within the walls of the prison, this phenomenon can be seen when a woman sincerely believes that the offender has moved a little away from the law, he is so innocent, he is a victim of circumstances and just needs unconditional love that will exalt him.
The woman “saving” the criminal is a vivid illustration of what can be done by realizing that feeling lives only in her imagination. We all do this to some extent, creating the image of the beloved in our own minds, while the real person is not at all like that. When undivided love begins to overwhelm you, you need to understand that you love not the person you don’t know, but an image created in your imagination.
Tip three: become active, do not focus on feeling
The thoughts that dominate during the feelings that captured you are usually very categorical: all or nothing, only he or nobody, without this person there is no sense in life, if I got it, then all problems would be solved. Do not follow such a strategy, it is always dangerous! Do not confine yourself to your feeling, do what life intended, do not break friendship and family ties. Unrequited love beats harder if you are single and have no other emotional needs.
Go to friends, go in for sports, go to the cinema, to concerts, do what you are interested in, work more. This will balance your feelings, help to go beyond the limits of focusing only on the object of passion.
Tip four: look into the future in all its manifestations
Remember the statements about unrequited love, the wise saying of King Solomon: "And this will pass." Nothing can last forever, no matter how strong love is, it will pass. The whole question is in time. Are you ready, seeing the meaninglessness of futile attempts, to give the best years to an inseparable feeling, so that in the end you will still end up without the object of desire, but with a lost life. Try to look at the situation from the perspective of the distant future. Maybe all this fuss will become funny to you.
Tip Five: Do not give in to futile dreams, get busy
The more you indulge in dreams and sufferings, the more salt you pour on an unhealed wound, it hurts. Find yourself as much work as possible that would take your time, require an understanding of the details and creativity. This will allow you to step back from the problem and more objectively assess the situation. Do not leave yourself time for fruitless dreams!
Tip six: do not think that you are not loved because of flaws
When you are not loved, it often seems that this is because something is wrong with you. Never think that way! You may be the most attractive and charming person in the world, but everyone does not have to love you. Each has its own soul, which loves in its own way, you have absolutely nothing to do with it. Some are simply not able to love.
Tip seven: find someone who can give you what you need
Some people fit only into a picture of relationships that implies destruction because they are not ready for responsibility. Look at your unrequited love and try to understand how responsible your obligations and those of your partner are. Maybe you will be able to understand that they have reached a dead end, where you can’t get out.
Focus your efforts on those who love you the way you are. Do not confuse the intensity and intensity of the torment of unrequited love with true love. Think for a moment how much easier it will become to live when you do not need to constantly think about this person. When you can choose to think about it or not, then thoughts of unrequited feeling will cease to haunt you.
And when you succeed, you can move away from the events that cause anxiety, find peace and add a bright color of your experiences to the rich palette of memories of your life experience.