The wives of drinking husbands, like no one else, know what a terrible disaster this is. Alcohol creates a huge gap between people who once loved each other, destroys warm relationships and forever deprives people around a drunkard of hope for a happy, calm life. Of course, the simplest solution to such a problem is divorce. But the alcoholic was not always like that - once he was kind, cheerful, loved, in the end. And many wives still postpone the breakup and try to understand the reason why the husband began to drink. They ask the question: "How to help my husband stop drinking?" Indeed, even when a person is drunk so much that all the values that were important to him earlier are relegated to the background before the need to drink again and again - this is not a reason to put an end to him.
Causes and signs of alcoholism
Most alcoholics never recognize themselves as such - often their "weighty" argument serves as their excuse: "I want to drink, eat alcohol - I will drink, no - I won’t, and I can stop drinking it myself, at any moment, I know how to make it! " But people close to and surrounding such a booze need to pay attention to several signs, the presence of which becomes a signal that alcohol has become a constant life partner for a man:
- If earlier holidays were celebrated only on significant dates (New Year, Birthday, March 8, etc.), now the alcoholic is looking for conceivable and unthinkable reasons for a feast.
- The choice of friends for such a person becomes not of interest, but only by the fact that he is comfortable drinking with them.
- A man becomes irritable, even aggressive - it is difficult for him to continue the previous communication with work colleagues, friends and family members.
What makes alcoholics drink? The cause of alcoholism in each case is always different, scientists have found that often a man is “forced” to drink by genetics and mood, as well as the unstable psychological state of the husband (depression, fears and self-doubt), ignored by his wife, also becomes the cause of drunkenness.
What does alcohol addiction lead to?
Alcohol causes pathological and irreversible changes in the human body, affecting absolutely all organs and systems. In addition to sufficiently noticeable physical harm to human health caused by regular drinking, alcohol addiction is accompanied by such characteristic changes in the personality of the “drinker” that in the end there is a complete degradation of his personality. The drinker, one way or another, will still come to the most sad outcome of his life, so you need to use all available and well-known methods of dealing with such dependence so that the alcoholic himself is aware of the harm from drinking. How to help a husband giving up drinking? Tell about the real dangers of alcohol. Each woman must “invent” herself - to find suitable arguments and words that can really become decisive for her man.
Myths about alcohol
Often, various strong opinions about the absolute safety of drinking are interfering with stopping drinking :
- Alcohol helps to relax and sleep better.
- Beer is not alcohol, it is light and can be drunk in unlimited quantities (by the way, beer also causes addiction and also violates the functionality of organs and systems of the human body, like drinks containing alcohol; there is even such a thing as beer alcoholism).
- Alcohol warms when it's cold.
- If you have a good bite, you won’t get drunk, you can drink as much as you want.
As practice proves, all these myths really often become the main "arguments" for a man, and, believing in the harmlessness of alcoholic beverages, a man becomes an alcoholic without realizing it. Nevertheless, it is important for the wife to convey to her husband information about the medical aspect of the harm of alcohol, using all the media. The promotion of a sober lifestyle can help in the case when the human body really does not tolerate alcohol - it takes a long time to recover after even a small dose of it. But for a drinker who enjoys drinking, it is almost impossible to prove the harm of alcohol!
How to help a drinking husband quit drinking: what should not be done and what should be done
When a husband stops drinking, his wife’s behavior and the psychology of her thinking must also change. To help a husband who quit drinking, first of all, the wife should become a kind of "role model", that is, not to drink herself, limit the appearance of alcohol in the house, not create stressful situations for a man and in every way limit her husband's communication with his usual company of lovers drink.
Husband quits drinking, how to behave?
For a woman, there are several rules for what to do and what not to.
So you can’t:
- Scandal. Reproaches, quarrels and scandals lead to the opposite effect - the husband again reaches for the bottle. When the husband stops drinking, he freaks out for any reason - anything can annoy him. Aggression of both husband and wife, provoked by the unfavorable situation in the house, does not contribute to the healing process.
- Also, one should not patiently endure all “drunken” acts of the husband, dutifully endure all his antics. Self-esteem can help deal with this situation.
- Show indifference. If the husband decided to stop drinking, the wife should strongly support him in this: be interested in everything that happens in his life, unobtrusively involve in household chores and worries about children. But, at the same time, it is necessary to remember that things should not be monotonous or monotonous, otherwise the man will get tired of everything quickly and he will reach for the bottle again.
It is necessary:
- To tie, as my husband decided, is not difficult - it is difficult to resist the urge to drink. To do this, the wife needs to limit the spouse's communication with buddy companions. If this company is planning another feast, you can arrange for this day or an exciting trip, from which the husband will not be able to refuse or offer him to do what he likes, a hobby.
- How else to help my husband quit drinking? It is necessary to create an atmosphere of warmth and coziness, care and maximum comfort in the house - to monitor the cleanliness of the home, to prepare delicious dishes. In addition, the wife needs to carefully monitor herself - not to meet her man “in a dressing gown and with curlers ...” A little make-up, a few new blouses and a good mood of the wife can make her husband rush home now.
- Often the cause of addiction to alcohol is elemental boredom. A loving wife who wants to help her husband overcome alcohol addiction should come up with a hobby that will interest her spouse.
It should be remembered that these rules are useful for household drinking or the first stage of alcoholism, during this period you can still “switch” the attention of a man and refuse to drink alcohol. If the man is an avid alcoholic with experience, then these tips will not bring the desired result. In this case, you need the help of a specialist.
Coding and other methods of getting rid of alcohol addiction
Today, there are many drug treatment clinics. Specialists who work there are able to provide competent first aid for binges (remove intoxication of the body) and relieve alcohol dependence with the help of medications or coding. To date, this method of getting rid of drunkenness is considered somewhat outdated - doctors prefer an integrated approach aimed at improving the psychological state of the patient. There are also methods of getting rid of alcoholism, which are quite popular today. This is hypnosis, acupuncture, herbal medicine, an appeal to folk healers and psychics, and even prayers. But, it must be added that doctors and close people around him can only help a person give up alcohol dependence, the main choice an alcoholic must make himself.
Psychologist's advice
An experienced psychologist knows effective treatment methods and can give a woman some tips on how to help her husband quit drinking, become an example for him in everything, not create stressful situations so that her husband does not have reasons for aggression and a desire to drink. It is advisable not to pay attention if the husband came home “with a smell”, not to cause a scandal, but just the next morning to inform the spouse about how this upset his wife. You can hang up a calendar in the apartment and, together with your spouse, impartially record in it all cases of alcohol consumption. If it is impossible for a wife to radically change her life, then she needs to reconsider her attitude to life situations and problems - this way one can defend the right to a full life in any circumstances.
How to behave with a husband who quit drinking?
A wife cannot constantly patronize her husband and solve his problems arising from alcoholism. Do not justify the husband in front of his colleagues and acquaintances, covering his bad habit. You also don’t need to constantly think about the needs of an alcoholic - you need to more and more often “remember” your beloved about yourself.
You should not be afraid of his threats to leave you, this is most often a banal blackmail, because an alcoholic is simply not able to make such cardinal decisions.
In no case, during a severe hangover, you should not give your husband even a bottle of beer. It is better at this moment to try gently but convincingly to give arguments about the harm and destructiveness of his habit. At moments of sobriety, you can talk with your husband about the need for treatment, even if he is in the stage of withdrawal (denial of alcohol addiction).
A woman needs to have restraint and carefully select words and actions so that she doesn’t inadvertently provoke her husband’s aggression, irritation and desire to “pour” all of this with vodka.
I don’t want, I won’t ... How to deal with the urge to drink?
Sometimes an alcoholic, who has started, suddenly has a desire to drink. Narcologists consider this a secondary craving for alcohol and the first step to a binge. In such cases, a wife can also use drastic measures, for example: lock her husband in a room or deprive him of freedom of movement. But, as can be seen from life experience, such measures are not always effective and even have the opposite effect - an alcoholic who escaped to freedom will still get drunk, in vain. Of course, in such cases, the optimal solution is to ask for help from specialists. But sometimes you can resort to other methods of distraction.
How can food help?
Sometimes delicious food, a beautifully served table can distract the alcoholic from his needs. It is necessary to remember the wife, whose husband decided to stop drinking. The substances contained in food irritate the taste buds and can increase the production of endorphin (a hormone of pleasure). In addition, the feeling of a full stomach distracts from all thoughts and desires, causing only a feeling of drowsiness. This natural process of the body can distract the alcoholic from the desire to drink his "legal 100 grams."
Help her husband with folk remedies
Traditional medicine knows many effective recipes for getting rid of alcoholism, which even medical professionals confirm:
- Hoofed root broth, added to alcohol, can cause severe vomiting. This can contribute to the development of aversion to alcoholic beverages, as well as to wait for the cherished words from an alcoholic: “I quit drinking, everything hurts!”.
- Medicines, such as Glycine and Biotredin, used according to a certain scheme, can relieve cravings for alcohol and calm the nervous system of an alcoholic.
Wives of alcoholics from despair are ready to try all the ways and means to know how to help her husband who quit drinking. But, unfortunately, no one can ever say for sure whether the chosen method will help in each case, because it all depends on the desire of the alcoholic to get rid of his addiction.