Hearing praise or talking to an interesting person - isn't that great? And suddenly, like a bucket of water on your head, do not flatter yourself. What does such a replica mean? Should I take it seriously? And what threatens self-seduction?
Sentimental literature of the 18th and early 19th centuries paid particular attention to the topic of seduction and self-seduction in stories about unhappy love. Vivid examples are “Poor Lisa” by Karamzin and “Goverment of Young Werther” by Goethe. Writers subtly and accurately describe the feelings of young heroes.
There are also many stories in fables in which self-seduction (as one of the most typical human features) is considered from all sides. Moths flying to the fire - one of the best images for such emotions.
Is it worth it to achieve the desired? Should praise, flattery, apparent comfort be overestimated? Are events, relationships correctly perceived, are there any tricks in them? Do we ascribe to our chosen ones those traits that were not born in them? Simply put, how often do we take one for the other?
The origin of the expression
What does "do not flatter yourself"? Let's look at the root of the verb "seduce": "flatter." The word root for him is "flattery."
Here everyone recalls the fable of I. A. Krylov "The Crow and the Fox":
How many times have they told the world
That flattery is vile, harmful;
But just not for the future,
And in the heart, the flatterer will always find a corner.
Unfortunately, life is even more difficult than in a fable. To seduce is to try to instill a false, but pleasant opinion, and then benefit from this situation. And to deceive is to succumb to self-deception. “Do not flatter yourself” - the meaning of these words is obvious: do not deceive yourself.
Judging by the number of stories devoted to this topic, as well as the number of synonyms, self-seduction is familiar to many. “Build castles in the air”, “put on pink glasses”, “amuse yourself with illusions” - expressions that reflect the temptations of a person who has lost a sense of reality. If an adequate understanding of the events was given to everyone easily, there would be no admonitions: "Do not be deceived, do not be seduced, do not be deceived." What do these tips mean?
Useful Tips
The false path along which flattery, coquetry or deception leads, makes loved ones warn of possible everyday mistakes. The ability to hear reasonable words, learn lessons from books, unfortunately, does not come immediately. Everyone has the right to their own personal experience and mistakes.
Hopes for love, affection, human relations, business and constructive communication are absolutely normal expectations of a young man. But how often people do not notice that they have come to the wrong place with such feelings and are unlikely to get what they want. The warning “Don't flatter yourself too much” means that more experienced friends have noticed a weak spot in your plans.
Trust other people's opinions? Or believe only your own eyes? How many stories on this topic in fiction. How many seduced girls and boys who believed in illusions could not cope with them. "Manon Lesko" by Abbot Prevost is another beautiful novel dedicated to this topic.
Is it worth it to deceive yourself
What features did Tatyana see in Onegin? Probably the best qualities of the characters of your favorite books. She invented her hero. In novels, much is built on feelings that are supported by self-deception and self-seduction.
There is a good fable "Fox and Grapes". She is often referred to when they want to blame someone who has not achieved the desired, abandoned the temptation. Like, the grapes are good, the fox blundered. In order not to regret it, she simply decided that she was green - "you’ll immediately nag your mouth." Was this goal really needed? It’s worth thinking about it. If the grapes are not green, then this does not mean that it was prepared for the fox.
Love and seduction
A great example of what the words "do not flatter yourself" mean in modern cinema. The heroine of the film "About LyuboFF" sincerely believed that she was loved. Fortunately, according to the plot, the girl has enough intelligence and character to understand that what is happening to her is not love at all. There is a wise thought in this melodrama. It completely coincides in meaning with the “Recognition” of A. S. Pushkin:
Ah, tricking me is not difficult
I myself am glad to be deceived.
The dearest Dasha first tries not to notice how inappropriately her chosen one behaves, attributing to him the best qualities. But it turns out that she does not like to deceive herself at all, and reality comes into its own.
Most of the works devoted to female credulity and a tendency to self-seduction do not end so optimistically, although there are pleasant exceptions.
A model of a unique female mind, not inclined to an illusory perception of reality, is in Jane Austen's novels. There are dozens of adaptations of her works. Pride and Prejudice is a great lesson on what it means don't flatter yourself. It has everything - an understanding of life, mores, its place in the social environment, people's motivation, all the nuances of seduction and self-deception.
One of the most difficult everyday tasks is not to believe the advice "not to flatter oneself" and to act at your own peril and risk. Who knows, maybe such an act will be true. Only forces should be a lot, if you still have to be disappointed.