Mother Earth is filled with ethnic groups and nationalities that are not eternally willing to play a joke on each other. For example, while in America they joke about the Russians, in Russia fables are written about Americans. An example is the same Zadornov, better known for his eternal utterance: “Well, the Americans are stupid! ..” And then he has countless monologues confirming this statement. In fact, everyone understands that the Americans are far from dumb, and therefore all this is perceived as a joke and nothing more. One of the most popular in our country has always been and probably will be jokes about the Armenians, while the Armenians at home have always been joking about Russians. What interesting jokes about them are in use in our country today?
What are the Armenians really?
In fact, the Armenians are a very hospitable, working and positive nation. In Armenia there is always sunshine, warmth and everywhere, as they say again around them, they grow lemons, tangerines and oranges. We will not go into details of whether this is so or not, the main thing is that the Armenians are very friendly and funny as one. Moreover, the humor about the Armenians is used not only in other countries, but the Armenians themselves are not averse to making fun of their increased hairiness, nose length, resourcefulness, etc. As we can see, all their shortcomings and advantages also apply to any other nation. But it is the Armenians themselves who love to flaunt them.
Some others consider it already a good joke about the Armenians of the photo of any person in which the face of this "glamorous" person is inserted.
There are almost as many demotivators and other pictures with this face on the network today as there are with the famous "Zhdun" and other company.
Armenian jokes about Armenians
Here is a set of jokes about the Armenians that the Armenians themselves invented and which are in use in Armenia itself.
Due to the strong tinting of the glasses, the Armenian shuttle, which was traveling to the moon, flew past this very moon.
***
In Armenian schools, boys always tug on girls mustache.
***
An Armenian walks past a keg selling beer. On the stall it says: "Beer is over, but for the Armenians it is completely over." An Armenian with interest asks the seller:
- And why did it end for the Armenians?
- Because for some reason the Armenians do not believe and always ask again: “Is it completely over?”
***
In Armenia, the tip of any teapot is 80% of the entire teapot.
***
The theater in Armenia is staging the play "Little Red Riding Hood." It comes to the moment of dialogue between Little Red Riding Hood and the wolf, and she asks:
“Grandma, do you have such big eyes for Pachim?”
- And in order to better see you ...
“Do you have such ears for Pachim?”
“And in order to hear better from you ...”
- Why such a bald nose?
“Ara, look at yourself, right?”
***
When applying for a job in the personnel department, a woman asks an Armenian:
- Well, who bought the diploma from?
- But what if the Armenian bought it right away? Maybe they gave me a shot?
Other jokes about Armenians
But not only Armenians themselves can come up with jokes about Armenians. Here is a set of jokes formed behind the cordon.
Moscow, Soviet time. The Armenian is trying to catch a taxing private trader. When “Moskvich” stops at his raised hand, he begins to wave, saying that you should pass, do not. Votes further. “Lada” stops, also waving - drive through. The Volga stops. The Armenian gets into the car and asks the driver:
- How do you scream?
- Basil…
- Make an addendum, Vasily. When Kagda padvishes minya to Gastinitsa and the little lady will come, I will also come in, I will touch her hand, and you say: “Chef, am I free?” I will say: "Yes, you can breathe." You will tell me: "Chef, give the steward to the gasoline." I'll give the steward, and so we will pay the taboo, right?
Basil nods, agreeing, and drives the Armenian to an expensive hotel. Drive up. It turns out a young lady. The Armenian closes the door of the car and kisses the lady's hand. Drove asks:
- Chef, am I free?
- Yes, it’s free, for today it’s better than net.
- Chef, give 500 rubles, even the hodovka junk ...
The Armenian looks at the carrier for a long time, then counts out 500 rubles and hands it to the window:
- Vasily, are you Maladets, right? ..
***
When boarding a train in one compartment, natives of Russia, Ukraine and Armenia turn out to be. The train starts moving, and it's time to make acquaintance. Russian reaches up and says:
- Vitaly, a Muscovite!
Crest:
- Mykola, Cossack!
The Armenian also holds out his hand:
- Ashot, BMW!
***
And the ark sailed to Mount Ararat, and Noah began to release his little animals from it, and suddenly he saw people running to the ark and joyfully waving their hands with shouts “Wai, Ara! Look over! A circus has come to us, yes! ”
***
There is a war. The Germans are catching up with the Armenian and Georgian. The Georgian climbed a tree, and the Armenian hid in the bushes. The Fritzes combed through the bushes and pulled an Armenian out of them. When he was led past a tree on which a Georgian was hiding, the Armenian raised his head and shouted:
- Katso, get down, we haven’t been caught, have we?
Harsh jokes
Black humor in jokes about Armenians is also quite common. Here is an example of a joke that exposes Armenians as complete idiots:
“And there are no ghosts in this hotel by any chance?”
- Yes, there is one. At night, one of the ghosts here creeps up to people behind, who are called the "Black Guest." It puts a hand on your shoulder and asks ...
- “Give my heart back?” ..
- No. Says: "Fuck me, Ara, don’t you know which room I stayed in?"
But the Armenians do not complain about such jokes. They quite get off like that:
Representatives of Turkey, Germany, Armenia, Russia and England gathered together in one company. The Englishman proclaims a toast: "For English power!" All drank according. The Turk rises: “For the Turkish carpets!” They drank too. Further - German: “For German accuracy!” Great toast. We drank it. Then the Russian gets up: “For Russian beauties!” They drank again. And then the Armenian gets up: “For the Armenians who are Russian beauties on Turkish carpets with English power and German precision ...”
Armenian radio
This is a separate section of jokes about Armenians, which are more akin to jokes about Stirlitz. They were in use back in Soviet times, but some of them are still relevant today, although they contain notes of black humor. But out of some tricky questions, the Armenian radio is twisted very resourcefully. Here are some of these jokes.
- Good afternoon, dear listeners. Says Armenian radio. We transmit signals of the exact time. The beginning of the sixth signal corresponds to 15 hours of Yerevan time: Peak ... Peak ... Peak ... Peak ... Peak ... Piiik. It’s 15 hours in Yerevan. For those who did not, we repeat: Peak ... Peak ...
***
The Armenian Radio is asked:
- What does the phrase “Love in the distance” mean.
The Armenian radio thought and answered:
- This is when you are at work, the bed is at home, and the drink is at the bar.
***
The Armenian Radio is asked:
- What do you think should be brought before the eyes of the Russians so that they believe that for the better things have finally come in Russia?
The Armenian radio thought and answered:
- Chubais with a chainsaw in his hands and Nabiulina selling seeds at the station ...
***
They asked the Armenian Radio: “What, in your opinion, is the most beautiful city in the world and how many nuclear bombs are needed to wipe it off the face of the earth?” To which the Armenian Radio, on reflection, replied: “Yerevan is the most beautiful city in the world, but Tbilisi is a little better ...”
Misunderstanding with a roller coaster
Today, a joke about an Armenian on a roller coaster is very popular on the net. The video has over a million views, and it is popular not only in Russia, but also abroad. In it, a man, sitting on a swinging swing, writing out a wheel around a bearing axis, begins to moan and beg to stop the carousel. Here it is this video.
It is not clear why everyone thinks it is a roller coaster. We dare to assure you that this is not the attraction at all. Yes, although it is dangerous in appearance, it’s not a roller coaster at all, but a peculiar multi-seat swing. Yes and there is no confirmation that the person in the video is exactly Armenian. But the audience was pleased to add this native of the Caucasus to the Armenians. Well then, let it be so. In any case, the Armenians will not be offended, it is one hundred percent. And the video is really funny.
How do the Armenians themselves treat the humor about them
The Armenians themselves, as already mentioned, are quite positive towards humor. They themselves are good at joking both at themselves and over the others, as evidenced by the fact that at the helm of one of the most humorous shows in our country - “Comedy Club” - it is the Armenian - Garik Martirosyan. This person just don’t put a finger in his mouth, he will be able to speak literally anyone, as can be seen from the same project of the First Channel "Searchlight Perishilton". Therefore, we wish all Armenians good health, good mood and more jokes, without which our life will be boring and joyless.