Hellinger's "Orders of Love" is the main book for those who have long been trying to find a way to maintain or build harmony in the family. His technique is used everywhere and it is officially recognized in Serbia. A book written in 2001, rhinestone found its fans who give it only positive reviews. Hellinger's Love Orders is a new and effective approach to creating comfort in the home. It is about this book that we will talk in our article.
about the author
Bert Hellinger is today considered one of the most innovative and influential psychotherapists in the world. He synthesized years of study and experience with many modalities in an approach that he developed independently and called "Family Constellations." He introduced a way of separating current family members from the unsolved problems of previous generations so that love can be passed on from generation to generation.
How did you come to psychotherapy?
The basis of influence in his life was primarily his parents, whose Catholic faith protected him from distortions of National Socialism. At 17, he was drafted into the German army and survived the fighting, capture and imprisonment as a prisoner of war allies.
At the age of 20, he became a Jesuit priest, having spent 16 of 25 years in the priesthood as director of a Zulu missionary school in South Africa. Throughout all time in South Africa, he underwent interracial ecumenical training in group dynamics led by the Anglican ministry. Their approach to dialogue, phenomenology, and individual experience influenced his subsequent work.
After leaving the religious order, he continued his studies in psychoanalysis, gestalt therapy and neuro-linguistic programming. He trained with Arthur Yanov, Virginia Satyr and Milton Erickson. By extrapolating various aspects of all his major influences, Burt created the Family Constellations approach to heal the family field. Thanks to constant observation, he saw certain patterns, which he called the "Order of Love." Hellinger and his work are constantly evolving with the recent disclosure of “Movements of the Spirit” and “Movements of the Spiritual Mind”.
Author's books
The list contains books that are available for reading in Russian. The list includes the following materials:
- "Orders of love: resolving systemic-family conflicts and contradictions" (2001);
- “The source does not need to ask the way” (2005);
- "Procedures for assistance" (2006);
- "We are moving forward. A course for couples in difficult situations" (2007);
- "Thought. Their Roots and Their Impact" (2008);
- The Great Conflict (2009);
- "Happiness That Remains" (2009);
- "Love of the Spirit" (2009);
- "Healing. Become healthy, stay healthy" (2011);
- "Success in life / Success in the profession" (2012);
- "Success Stories in Life and Profession" (2015).
Hellinger's Order of Love
The Family Constellation method was developed in the early 1980s by a German psychotherapist, philosopher, theologian and educator Bert Hellinger. Under the influence of group dynamics, primary therapy, transactional analysis and various types of hypnotherapy, he adapted the method to the modern therapeutic approach. Hellinger’s “Love Order” has been successfully applied worldwide and is also known as the “Constellation Work” or “Hellinger Work”.
"Family constellations" is a phenomenological method. With a deep healing effect, it goes beyond the scope of classical therapeutic work. It includes both the transpersonal field, which is unknown to us, and the level of the soul, intertwined with relationships in the family and social environment. This method goes beyond the personal level and allows you to understand the dynamics of trans-generation and the impact on people.
Understanding this dynamics through the so-called collective memory, which connects us with transitivity, we become able to understand the connections and the true meaning of relations. With this approach, tremendous progress can be made, as well as permissions and the healing process in human life.
Method Recognition
The "Family Constellation" is one of the official methods in traditional medicine recognized by the Ministry of Health of the Republic of Serbia in accordance with Article 6 of the Regulation on the Conditions and Procedure for Performing Methods and Procedures in Traditional Medicine.
In addition to Serbia, Hellinger’s Order of Love is used by practitioners around the world. Although therapy does not have an official status, its methodology underlies the work of psychologists, leading couples to agreement.
It is known that on the topic of how to find harmony in the family, a sufficient number of books and manuals have been written. However, most of them are either street pulp fiction, which is not able to influence the course of events, or are too complicated for interpretation and subsequent use.
What is this book about?
When a couple enters Bert Hellinger's work, partners enter into the realm of an unusual solution. Hellinger’s book, The Order of Love, describes the author’s approaches - family constellations and the observations that underlie them, from which they are formed. He reveals the deepest dynamics of relationships. People begin to see how invisible forces, including non-present family members and those that were in past generations, and decisions that were made long ago, affect the relationships of current partners with each other at many different levels.
Stages of "Constellations"
Bert Hellinger's book, The Orders of Love, presents shorthand transcriptions of the constellations with numerous pairs, supplemented by questions, comments, and discussions to focus this multidimensional process. As a rule, the "constellation" goes through two stages. Firstly, hidden, but convincing - the impact on the family. At the second stage, healing movements and affirmations are discovered (restored) and then checked in the "constellation". The large or small mental adaptation that takes place expands the pair's vocabulary in finding a solution.
Bert Hellinger's voice is clear and strong on topics such as love, suffering, communication, sacrifice and taking, parental rights, childlessness, loyalty, separation and sexuality. There are moments of exceptional clarity and unpleasant surprise in the entire Book of Orders of Love by B. Hellinger: the resonance and dissonance of a new understanding of the ways in which we can support love, and the ways in which love can support us.
Practice Review
For doctors, psychologists, consultants of all kinds and psychotherapists, the main text for the work is "The Orders of Love" according to Bert Hellinger. The experience and feedback of many practitioners in this field demonstrates that this is the most dynamic development in the field of psychological and physical healing in recent decades.
The book is a continuous combination of narration, anecdotes, transcripts and didactic material, illustrating how family members bring injuries and misunderstandings to each other, often for generations, and how they are resolved by restoring proper “orders of love”. The theme of the book is much broader and deeper than "How to have a good relationship." It is about the unrecognized rules of love and relationships and the restoration of the integrity of family systems and relationships.
The practitioners in the reviews say that long-term psychological and physical problems that did not respond to other forms of healing were resolved in one "constellation." Anyone involved in counseling should read this book and understand this material.
Oddly enough, given how popular psychotherapy is in the United States and in many other countries, Russia is perhaps the last country on the planet that recognizes and accepts the merits of the work of Bert Hellinger.